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Strip 308, Volume 3, Page 10

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< Seraphim >

Asmodeus didn't stand a chance...

"camera angles"

Wednesday - September 4, 2002

[Seraphim] - 02:10:01 - [link here]

(quick note: part two of my interview with the pulse. is up. The Megatokyo store over at Think Geek should be opening today, so be sure to check back to see when. - piro)

The inspiration for this "Seraphim Check" was a news show about how fashion photographs of supermodels are digitally altered to create the perfect image. I was astounded. First the clothes are pinned, glued, and stapled so they actually fit over the girdles and padded bras used to perfect the model's figure. Then the images are sent to a special facility where inches are taken off of thighs and arms (to correct 'bad' camera angles, don't we all suffer from that?) and any wrinkles, crease lines or pregnancy stretch marks are erased. Super models are gorgeous people, and even they are not gorgeous enough 'au natural'. Does that mess with their minds? So in the end, it isn't enough that real women should look like super models - we're supposed to look like digitally enhanced super models. No wonder so many teenagers have poor self image perceptions and eating disorders.

There was a great deal of controversy regarding the "Angelic Body Attack". Yes, it was my idea. But don't worry, I use a body double. What was underneath the coat? The mass marketing machine that forces the perfect female image on society and makes half of it bow down before it, and the other half try to emulate it, was under the trench coat. The marketing machine that feeds the multi-billion dollar cosmetics, diet supplement, and cosmetic surgery industries. Trust me, even Asmodeus, the evil demon, didn't stand a chance against that. What chance then does the average person have against the media? The greatest irony is that it is all smoke and mirrors. The only people who fit the stereotypical image are 12 and the rest are digitally altered and erased. Whenever I think about it I can't help remembering Mike Teevee from "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" and all his atoms being blown apart and then reassembled elsewhere. I could afford to lose a few atoms in that kind of process.

As for stereotypes, I am really getting tired of the 'librarian' image that is flaunted all over. From the reference in Frasier that the only women one meets through dating agencies are "librarians who want help bathing their mother" to the King of Queens show about Carrie wearing a her hair in a bun and the only way to make her stop was to show a picture of the school librarian wearing a bun pulled so tight it had the added benefit of acting like a facelift. King of Queens ragged on librarians in another episode where Doug and Carrie donate money to the library and hilarity ensues when the old lady librarian can't seem to count. I also expected George Lucas to be more open minded. Even a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, the librarian is a sourpuss old lady in a bun. Of course in LOTR the librarian was a male and he let Gandalf drink in the reading room. What was that? It was a freaking archives and he's bringing in his Starbucks. Obviously, only female librarians 'shhhush' and don't let food or drink in. Let me tell you, if Legolas came in wanting an answer I'd be letting my hair down out of that bun. That elfin look is hot. Mmmmmm. But I digress.

Piro brought back some really nice fan art of Seraphim from Otakon. Vaz did an excellent watercolor. Piro never puts Seraphim in such stylish clothes. And the plushie Seraphim doll by Ramothre-chan was so very clever. The turtleneck tank top was made out of a cut off nylon knee sock that really hugs the curves. Kawaii! I also saw in the photos from the con that the doll was greatly abused throughout and she came to me with only one boot. I also have to say many of the Seraphim cosplayers look more like Seraphim than I do. Although, one observant fan did recognize us driving behind her one evening this past summer in Ann Arbor. I ran across her blog while searching the internet. A perfect stranger recognizes me in a car through her rearview mirror while Mr. Poor who goes to my college and has come into my office sends me an email wondering if I am truly at the 'U' or if it is fiction. I was probably the one that spoke with him! We never run into anyone wearing MT swag but my former coworker Merrie would come in and tell me about her and Dan, her fiance, meeting someone in an MT shirt. Even Tanya at work has a friend who is a reader. If it wasn't for being in grad school, the comic, the book... maybe we would get out more.

Alas, I have some images to digitally alter...

seraphim

< Dom >

Oop ack!

"Don't let these shakes go on"

Sunday - September 8, 2002

[Dom] - 23:30:00 - [link here]

Before I get into my rant, I would like to rejoice in the beginning of football season--or more specifically, Fantasy Football season. It marks another great year of trash talk, janky trade proposals, and me yelling "Yeah, that's right, I beat you and you had MARSHALL FAULK. How do you feel NOW?" Okay, done for now.

Okay, let's take a quick look at what books (comic or otherwise) Dom has read and re-read over the past week.

Touch, Adachi Mitsuru. Widebans 1-11
The Dark Knight Returns, Frank Miller.
Kingdom Come, Alex Ross
The Sound and the Fury, William Faulkner.
Alice in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll.

Given the list above, I think you can understand why I'm trying very, very hard not to write anything right now. It'll end up monosyllabic, inane, and nearly incomprehensible.

Okay, okay, so that's how my rants usually are, I admit. But it's worse than usual, okay?

But man. My dreams are so messed up right now. They start with me playing for the Hanshin Tigers, and move to breaking criminal noses with impunity while spouting run-on sentence upon run-on sentence about my mother, singing about some horrible pun or other. I can actually remember them, that's how weird they are. But oh well. I'll live, as far as I know.

But from this eclectic reading list, I've come to a couple conclusions. First of all, Frank Miller is the only person who should ever be allowed to write Batman. Ever. It's like Tim Burton directing it--nothing else comes close. Hell, I'll go running to see the Batman Broadway musical when it comes out, simply because Burton does it. And when Batman: Year One is finally made into a movie? First in line, baby.

Second, I do love baseball. I just don't like the players. I won't get into the details of it, but I poked around the press on August 30th, and noted that only Barry Zito, the A's player representative, even mentioned what the strike would have done to people who depend on baseball for their livings, such as the stadium workers who e-mailed me after my baseball rant.

And just to be silly, when the Mariners come to town this weekend and Ichiro's at the bat, I want two friends with me who're willing to paint themselves and go shirtless so we can write めざせ on our chests and 甲子園 on the back. Why? Why not?

And I've also decided that there's no such thing as reading too much Faulkner.

But I won't get into that in this rant--I'm tired, and there's Warcraft to be played.

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